Years ago, before I made Christ my Lord, and savior. I would dream about a house. A dark house, this house was alive. It had a life in itself. It could breathe, it could see, and hear, it could talk, it was evil and mean. Very ominous, and foreboding.
I would dream about this house often. I can still see it, in my memory. Each room, had a life in itself. It was a big house, and in this house, I would be afraid. There was no place to go, without the fear, tormenting me. I could not hide in this house, and it knew everything about me, and would mock me, and laugh at me. Every time, I dreamt about that house, I would be sad, troubled. How did it know I was there?
For years, every once, in a while I would dream about this house. And every time, that I did, I would sense and see it. It was so engraved in my memory.
When I became a Christian, and I gave my heart, to Christ. I prayed, to God, that I would not dream about that house, or be tormented by it. And so, for many years, I stopped dreaming about it.
I guess I found a lot of peace in my Christianity. But I also know, every day is a choice, and a test in faith. Yet, as a Christian, I know I am not perfect. I have had to grow, working out my salvation. Finding out who God is. And who I am through Christ. It is a journey…..But I will not let go of God. And as I have gone through things though, I know the goal is Holiness. Which I will write about more so even later. But with that in my mind, I know as well the enemy does not want any Christian to achieve that. For that is to be in “one mind, with Christ.” So this may be part of the understanding, and I am going for Holiness as a goal. In any event….
So, last night, I went to bed, and to be honest, I was a little sad, and yes, even a little angry. That prayers have not been answered, that I am still in the place I was years ago, as far as my dreams, ambitions, etc. And I went to bed, not totally at peace. It has been hard on us financially, and yesterday, we began tithing. Not just making offerings, but tithing. We have been moody, and frustrated, yet willing to obey God. Adamant in this. But still frustrated. So, I went to sleep, somewhat anxious.
Again, I dream about the house. I had not dreamt about that house for at least 30 years. Almost as long, as I have been a Christian. Yet, I knew, I was in the house again. It was familar. I knew my way in the house. And as I walked in the house, I was not afraid. The rooms were no longer frightful, they were pleasant rooms. With music, and joy…..This time, the rooms were illuminated with light, and I was not afraid of the house. It had peace, it was not mocking me, it was not fearful. It had rooms, that were illuminated, with love, and compassion.
Yet, there were chambers in the house, that were still dark. I did not want to go into those rooms. I turned away. Because I had remembered them, from my prior dreams. But, I felt a prompting to go in those rooms, and face, that darkness. I did not want to go into those rooms, because from my past experiences, bad things had happened in those rooms. Scary Things, that I do not even think I can put into words, but they were rooms of sin.
It was stagnant, sort of like me lately. In some ways. Very still and depressing. For no light was evident. No truth, no love. The fear, wanted to stop me, from going into those rooms. But a sweet voice, said, “Don’t be afraid. Face the rooms. Go into the rooms. Don’t be afraid, I am with you.”
As I could see in the rooms, they were dingy, they were shabby, and they were in need of cleaning. I said a prayer, and went into the rooms. And I said, “Lord, fill these rooms, with your love, your holy spirit. Take away the evil spirits, that have been here. Cleanse it. With your love. Fill it. I surrender these rooms to you. Don’t leave me in here without you. I plead the blood of Jesus. Please Lord Jesus.”
All of a sudden, dusting, Refreshing began…..Laborers, people, perhaps angels, were there, because my mom, and one of my uncles were there. In those rooms, were people, I know, and love. Also there were friends, and people in ministry, and they began to clean up, the rooms. They began, to scrub, and rearrange things, and when I woke up, the rooms, had light. They were worthy of inhabiting. Cleansed. No longer shabby but comfortable. It felt like home. I woke up.
There have been so many times, when God by His Holy Spirit, has spoken to me when I wake up. First thing in the morning. And today, was one of those days….And this is what He said. As I was thinking about my dream, I could hear him telling me this….
The dark house, was you. You were in darkness, you were in sin, you were fearful, you were mocked by your ownself. The devil, was there, and his plan, was to destroy you. But I have come, that you would have life abundantly. But even though, you did give me your heart, you had not totally surrendered to me. You had not completely trusted me, you were holding onto those rooms, those chambers, and darkness was still there. But now, you have totally surrendered, and I have cleaned those rooms. “With my holiness.” Your dark house is no longer a dark house. It is now the Temple of God. It is worthy of me to reside in. Because you have surrendered all of yourself. II Corinthians 6:16 And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? For ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them, and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.
As I write this, I know, perhaps, maybe someone can relate to this as well. You live with yourself, in your body, which is a house as well. Is it dark? Is it fearful? Are there things in that house you are trying to hide? That make you feel unworthy? I don’t know whats in your house, whats in your life, from memories, fears, or experiences.
But don’t you want it to be a temple of the living God, so you can have peace? And no longer tormented from the past, your sins? Or let me even add this, from the pain, from others. That has stolen your peace, because you were abused, or hurt in some way. God can take that pain, or any pain, even pain, you have caused on someone. Jesus, can cleanse that…..
You may or may have not given your heart to Christ. Yet, part of you, and I am not judging you…. Because my feeling, from this, is that, I have grown in the Lord. So, parts of my house, or my life, did have light. But there were parts of me that were in darkness. And may still be vague. Even now. Who knows our souls, better than God?
But, I know who God is! The King of Kings. Anything is possible with God.
So who am I to judge you? When I am trying to figure myself out. All I know, in my relationship with the Lord, Gods word has illuminated my life, but yet, I have had darkness in my life. Not being sure of myself. Not, always sure, if I am on the right path. Though, I do try to walk the way, and the truth, and the life of Christ. John 14:6. But sometimes, when you cannot always see, you are just trusting you are on the right path.
Life is a journey, and there are times, when we walk by faith, but we can be in darkness. Only by God, and his word, can it be illuminated. Does that make sense? For thou hast delivered my soul from death: wilt not thou deliver my feet from falling, that I may walk before God in the light of the living? Psalm 56:13
Anyway….Maybe you are like me, where you have given your heart, to God, but still there are areas that need work, that need life, and light. All I know, is that this whole dream, and my life, is so symbolic to me. According to scripture. The word of God, says we are the temple of the living God. But we need to keep seeking him to bring the light in. I Corinthians 6:15 Know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own?
And it just made me think….Has my doubt, my fears, kept him in my temple, but in only a few of the rooms? In a few parts of my life? I don’t know. He knows, but we don’t always know. I don’t know why after so long I would dream about that house….
But this morning, I prayed, and I surrendered, again, every chamber, every room of my heart, and my life to be filled with his spirit. For I worship my Lord, in spirit, and in truth. I want to live a life of holiness. His holiness. I do not want to give place to the devil. I don’t ever want to let my darkness, my sins, my selfishness, or attitude keep Christ, from inhabiting my heart. My house. Me…..
If I am to dream about this house, from hereon…. I don’t want to see it in darkness, mocking me, or fear in me. I want to see it as a Temple of God. I want my soul, to inhabit, the praises of God, to give him glory and honor. I want my soul, to be a place of beauty, hope, compassion, love, and trust. I want to please God, with all of my heart, soul, and mind. Because I love my Lord, I so appreciate what Christ did for me, on the cross. I know I have to grow, but I want to see this place, as a place of beauty, where the rooms, will turn into a palace, a mansion, where God can live, in my heart. A temple of the living God. Where people, will see Christ in me, and I in him. Where love will be evident.
Yes, I was a dark house, but I believe, I am changing to be more of a temple of God. Isaiah 38:20 The LORD was ready to save me: therefore we will sing my songs to the stringed instruments all the days of our life in the house of the LORD. I know this is my soul….
I think if someone saw this as a movie. They would be able to relate to it. I know I do, I have lived in that dark house, that tormented me, but now I am praying it will be a temple of the Living God, for his presence to be there….Its my soul. Jonah 2:7 When my soul fainted within me I remembered the Lord: and my prayer came in unto thee, into thine holy temple.
Just my thoughts, with Love, Elena Ramirez
A Prayer of Honor
Thank you Father, for residing in my heart. In this temple, that I totally surrender to you, by Jesus Christ. Thank you Lord, for residing in my heart. With Love, Amen
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