WHEN CHRISTIANS DO NOT APOLOGIZE ~ By Christian Author Elena Ramirez

if interested in reading my books via Smashwords, go to this link. My latest book. BEHAVIORAL CURSES THAT CHANGE INTO BLESSINGS WITH CHRIST. This book brings attention to the behaviors, one may have that can contribute to a curse. But by Christ it can change into a blessing. A must read for someone wondering about generational curses etc. And why we do some of the things we do.... "HOW TO HAVE FAITH" This book is a self-help book to bring insight to your faith, and to know what pleases God. Both are on SMASHWORDS..... https://www.smashwords.com/interview/ElenaRamirezChristianauthor If interested in ordering the Paper Back go to this link. http://howtohavefaith.wordpress.com

if interested in reading my books via Smashwords, go to this link. My latest book. BEHAVIORAL CURSES THAT CHANGE INTO BLESSINGS WITH CHRIST. This book brings attention to the behaviors, one may have that can contribute to a curse. But by Christ it can change into a blessing. A must read for someone wondering about generational curses etc. And why we do some of the things we do….
“HOW TO HAVE FAITH” This book is a self-help book to bring insight to your faith, and to know what pleases God. Both are on SMASHWORDS…..
If interested in ordering the Paper Back go to this link. http://howtohavefaith.wordpress.com

One thing, I have seen, is people do not know how to apologize. Maybe they repent to God, I don’t know. But I have seen especially here on social media, FB, Twitter, and other networks, is that people, really hide behind their computers.

They say spiteful, mean attacking words, that really do not bring light, or substance. And I don’t know, I have had a few battles myself. Where maybe I brought it on myself.

But when I am wrong. I apologize. I don’t let it pass, without humbling before God, and others. I have sometimes, just wished someone well, Gods blessings, and they took my words, and wanted to argue. This recently happened. And I could not understand it.

But I don’t have to take it either. And if someone cannot show me some respect. I don’t need to further communicate with that person. I forgive. But I don’t put up with that kind of nonsense.

I have enough self respect, dignity, and better sense, then to go in the gutter, with someone, who does not want to be reasonable. Especially when I know in my heart, I do not have an ulterior motive, to make someone look bad.

Its sad, Christians, in particular, who still have the ways of the world, in their actions, but have not seen that Christ called us to love one another, to be humble, and to forgive.  I would think that also includes apologizing.  I just don’t think we see, how this holds us back.  How we cannot grow.  How we can get roots of bitterness. How we open a door to the devil.  Folks, this is spiritual warfare.  We have to see, what are we doing!  

In this election process, I have seen filth come out of some people, that say they are Christians.

And I ask myself, where is the love, that Christ said we would be known by? Oh well. Repenting, asking God to show us who Christ is, and yes apologize.  If you call yourself a Christian, love should be there!  You cannot have it, if you cannot learn to apologize, that means being humble.  That means throwing away that pride.  It means asking God….

To forgive you.  It means, that we reap what we sow.  Do you want to reap rudeness, mean spirits coming your way, because you are unable to apologize?  Folks, there is a spiritual realm, and God sees.  Do we want to be corrected harshly by Him, because we think we are better then somebody else?  

Remember whom He loves He corrects.  He loves you, but He is a well mannered God, kind and does not resort to being rude. We have to try and do things the way of the Lord.  Being rude, hateful, unapologetic, is not fruit of the spirit, and you need to watch it.  We all do.  

My thoughts anyway…..




Disclaimer:  Reader Please Note,  Do this, or do not do this at your own risk.  These are my thoughts, but you make your own decision.  My only motive and goal, is to bring hope to the hopeless, to those who have been disrespected.  Or feel they have no options.  Your not helpless!  Pray about it, and ask God.  He will guide you.  

September 2, 2012.

Curses, I have seen enough of them in my life, in my families lives, and others.  I believe God has given me discernment, and understanding, as to how they can happen.  But this post, is not about that, in the sense, that even though, I could write about them.  I will not.  There are some things, one may understand the mystery of, but you don’t give it away.  Especially, in a public forum like this.  No, if the right publisher or the resources came, yes, I would publish my writings on this.

But, I want to talk about demanding respect, and yes apologies, to break the curses.  In your own life.  So you can be healed.  So you can grow.  So you can have the confidence, that only Christ can give.  So, I give this away, from my heart, if it will help anyone.  To grow, to change, to be the person, they should be.

There are times, when you should demand respect, and an apology, and then there are times when you don’t you let grace, come in.  And you extend it, as Christ would.  But know this, Christ was not a pushover.  He told you truth.  Sometimes, even over throwing tables, in anger, but it was truth.  He was not a pushover!

Some people, will see your niceness, and consider it a weakness.  They will challenge you, they will try to make themselves superior over you.  Yes we are to treat people equally, but you need to be on guard.  Because they do not walk in love.   You need to be on guard to know this.  To stand on your own merit, in Christ.  But to be aware, that some people are not nice, and will take advantage of you, if you let them.  Don’t let them.  Respect yourself!

I consider myself, a nice person, a very nice person.  I believe I have the heart of Christ.  I am compassionate, I am caring, for my brothers and sisters, for the world.  For even helpless, little animals, that are abused.  I care that people, grow.  That they have a sense of who they can be in Christ.  For it is Christ that makes all the difference in a persons life.  He miraculously, changes us, to be like Him.  In love.

But it takes an awareness, it takes, obedience.  I have learned to be humble.  I have learned, from my experiences, why it is so important to have a flexible spirit in the Lord.  So, He can teach me.  So, I can be used by Him.  I am always aware of the characteristics of the devil.  And pride, is an ugly thing.  It blocks love.  It blocks our blessings.  But I am more aware of who Christ is, and who I can be in Christ.  The greatest of love, comes from Him.  His holiness.  Thats where the victory is!

So, I write this, not to puff myself up.  Not to say its me, but to give glory to God.  For, no, it is the Lord, who has taught me, and yes shaped me, from even the experiences, I have had, where people did not respect me. From even fights from my childhood.  Knowing, how cruel people can be.  Nor did they care, if they wounded me, and left me to die spiritually.  Even from family.

But it is Christ, who has taught me to fight.  And fight a good fight of faith. Not like the world.  Not like the devil.  But in prayer, on my knees, walking in love.  Walking in His truth.  This is how I have now learned to fight.  Knowing I do not fight flesh and blood, but principalities in high places.  Ephesians 6:12.  So I put on the armor of God.  To withstand in the evil day.  You know the Lord, is gracious, He is kind, He is merciful, in things, but in His ways, this is what, I also hope to fashion myself after.

But lets get one thing straight right away.  God is not mocked.  God, may let you think you have gotten away with something, but He will have His final say.  So, I see how my Lord is in this.  I know, I sin, I come short of His glory.  But, I see, the favor, and blessings, of integrity, and honor, when you respect yourself.  In Christ.  And for the record, because God is not mocked, if you are obedient to God, He will defend you, when you are mocked.  Because you are His servant.  People have no idea, the curses that brings when you come against a servant of God.

If we only judged ourselves……but if people do not have that discernment to apologize, and to treat you kindly. It is your responsibility, to demand respect and apologies.  You are not meant to be someones punching board.  Or someones stepping mat.  With words or with physical abuse.  There are some people, who will not give you that respect, if you demand it.  So be aware of it, even now as I write.  But those people, are not worth your company, or your love.  So let them go.  Life is too short, to keep trying to make a wrong right.  Or to break the curse in them.

There will be a time, when you see, that nothing you can do, stops this.  That you have done all you can.  By praying etc.  You tell me even now; Elena you have no idea.  My demanding respect, will not change this.  Then get away!  God will make a way.  Even here I implore you, be safe.  Do not return evil for evil.  Do not get into unforgiveness, or even revenge.  Get away from the devil.  Get away from the traps, for your own good, and peace of mind.

Maybe you cannot even demand apologies.  Maybe this is a situation, where someone is in authority over you.  So you have to keep your cool.  But you can demand for yourself, a better way of doing things.  Through Christ.  God will provide.  But do not stay in a place, where even your meager requests are not honored.  Or where there is abuse.  No one should have to go through this.  Just be wise!  Pray!

Have not I commanded thee?  Be strong, and of good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed:  for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever, thou goest.  Joshua 1:9

You need to break the curse in yourself, and in your own life.  For your own well being, for your peace.  For your self-esteem.  For your strength, that only Christ can give that.  For you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you.  The only way, to do that is by Love.  It takes love, Gods love to strengthen you, to recognize, when people do not honor you, or respect you.  If you see the key signals, like avoidance, defiance, judgement, etc.  These people do not love you.

You are hoping, against hope, that they would honor you.  But if you do not train people, to respect you.  They won’t.  You do not react as they do.  With words, with vengeance, or with returning evil for evil.  No you, speak words, that edify yourself, that person, and more then anything that brings glory to God.  You speak Gods word, for He says your the head, and not the tail, as you obey Him.  He says you can do all things through Him for He strengthens you.  He tells you, that you will be hated.  But that He has overcome the world.  And so can you.

But do this, knowing this word.  From God.  He that reproveth a scorner, getteth to himself shame:  and he that rebuketh a wicked man getteth himself a blot.  Reprove not a scorner, lest he hate thee:  rebuke a wiseman and he will love thee.  Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be yet wiser, teach a just man and he will increase in learning. Proverbs 9:7-9.  

So who are you dealing with?  Someone wise, who honors God, or someone who is just rambling.  Who is a scorner.  Look at the clues.  Proceed with caution….

He has so many promises, but you have to find them in His Holy word, and again I interject, look at the King James Bible for the powerful words, that shows you who you are, and how to live life in Him.  He sent His word to heal us, and deliver us from destruction.  Psalm 107:20 (paraphrasing)

Someone recently told me that words are just words.  And that just told me, how little this person knew.  For we have power, of life and death in our tongue.  Proverbs 18:21. Read it from the King James version. Even though, they tried to puff themselves, in pride at me.  When I started recognizing that spirit, that was not humble, not considerate of me.  I knew I only had one option, and that was demand an apology, and respect.  I was not going to get into the curse, of unforgiveness.  Or to continue in an argument, that really was to be honest, not making any sense.  It was so trivial.

And I will say this even here.  Because the Lord commands me, to forgive others I do so automatically.  I do so with a heart to please my Lord, because He has forgiven me of my sins.  I know the difference.  With forgiveness, and without it.  And I would rather have it, so I ask God for it.  With a humble heart even daily.  I pray to keep my heart soft and tender.  So, I have forgiven everyone, who has hurt me, offended me, treated me shabbily, and who has not for the record, apologized to me.  This has healed me, and comforted me, so much, that I do not have a root of bitterness.  But you have to nip it, at the seed.

But I do not have to accept disrespect, or defiance.  Rudeness, rude words, or someone who is totally inconsiderate to me.  Thats not extending grace, that is giving someone permission to treat you rude over and over again, unless you break that cycle.

You have to recognize, and respect yourself, to demand that respect, and that apology.  I mentioned, in my last post, about sending love, breaking curses, making amends with family.  Because you only get one family.  But, I mentioned, my own immediate family, with God, as our foundation, and my husband and son.  Well one thing, that works for us, is we demand apologies, if that person offends.  If that person, in our family, says something, that is mean, or cruel, or insensitive.

We stop, we say “Hey, I want an apology.”  And that family person, stops, recognizes the injustice of it, and yes does apologize.  This is one reason, why we have unity.  It is called respect.  It does not mean, that the other person, is right or wrong.  But when you say something, you are held accountable.

They are not just words.  You cannot sling words, without, knowing this comes from the abundance of your heart.  And what is ruling your heart, God or the devil?  Do you want to really wound others with words, when you can control them, for your own good?

So when this happens, you have to stand your ground.  You have to break the curses.  This may be hard, for someone, but I would rather, respect myself, and respect who I am in Christ, then to continue, not growing, or not changing to who I should be in Christ.  So I have learned this.

People will treat you, the way you let them treat you.  Isn’t it time to break the curses in your own life?  You do it with Gods love.  For him, for yourself, and for others.  You know with discernment, the difference.  Christ sacrificed for you, on the cross, so you could see who you can be in Him.  To break curses.

I recommend, that you do write out your stipulations.  Put it on paper, on the computer, on someones e-mail etc.  And format, and make it a contract, that these things must be done.  Write them a letter.  Mail it!  Explain, why you want an apology.  Don’t just throw it out there, if someone, is just mocking you and disrespecting you anyway.  Make sure, they know you are serious.  Some will just erase your thoughts anyway, but if you can make sure they do read it, so send it in various ways.  Send the message, that you will not be treated shabby, and you do not appreciate defiance, and disrespect.  Tell them!

Write it out, write out your stipulations.  So they can even see later, the error, of their ways.  This is not judging them.  This is discerning, when people are not being who they should be as well in Christ.  This is telling them, enough.  This is what you have done.  I am communicating this, because it is wrong.  I will not argue with you back and forth.  These are my standards, respect them, or leave me alone.  Like I said, don’t be surprised if they do leave you alone.

But at least you have stopped the curse.  You have rebuked the devil, in the name of Jesus.  You have stopped the curse of someones mean, and cruel words.  You have reversed the curse!  Don’t you dare, let them tell you something that is so against who you are in Christ, that belittles you!  Tell them no, this is not true.  I am a child of God!  You then have gained ground.  You have stood still, and let the Lord fight the battle.  For the battle is the Lords…..

Pray for these people.  Pray the best for them.  For you see, that someone hurt them, and they did the only thing they knew.  To protect themselves.  They learned the sin of offending.  No one apologized to them.  They do not know how.  They are defiant, and disrespectful.  But…..Don’t be like them.  Break the cycle, break the curse.  Always be careful.  For we don’t know how people will react.  But you can protect yourself.  And gain, self-esteem.  Again forgive, but do not get caught up in the curse of this.  Grow in Christ, and His love.

And with this last thought, as I conclude.  Demanding respect does not always mean you are “demanding.”  In asking for an apology. It could also be saying, I love you, I am being firm in this, because I want God to bless you too.  Knowing, God lifts the humble, but turns from the proud.  If you see this, and have a change of heart, then your on the way, to the blessings….

Likewise ye younger, submit yourselves unto the elder.  Yea all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility;  for God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble.  Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time.  I Peter 5:5-6

 Blessings, in Christ, Just my Thoughts, Elena Ramirez

Father, I thank you, I praise you, I exalt you.  I honor you.  I pray, for any thought, or any word, that I say, be brought to the obedience of Christ.  I pray, to know who I am in Christ.  Lord, I do want to always have a forgiving heart.  But I see you.  I see that you are demanding, for us to obey you.  Your commandments, your authority.  I know in order, to reap blessings, I have to honor and respect others as well.  But I do not have to become someones, stepping stone.  Or used to be a punching bag, because they are frustrated.  Or they do not know how to walk in love.  I thank you for what you have been teaching me, about curses, and breaking them.  I thank you, that you teach me to honor myself, because of Christ.  Not being puffed up, or rude, for love, is not that.  Love is kind, love is considerate.  And even here, I write your words.  To guide me, to guide whoever needs to see this.  Lord send angels to protect.  To comfort.  This could cover so much, and as I write it, someone could see it, and it means something totally different, because of their circumstances, so I want to be careful, but we need you first and foremost.  I pray all who is in need of wisdom in this, would seek you first, and foremost.  Help them!  In Jesus name.  Amen

Charity (love) suffereth long, and is kind, charity (love) envieth not, charity (love) vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easy provoked, thinketh no evil.  Rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth.  Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.  Charity (Love) never fails…I Corinthians 13:4-8